I Review Sweeney Todd (2 of ?)

Part one.

If you haven’t seen this version of Todd, go watch it. Or buy it.

Then come back and watch it with me. It is here we go our several ways.

The young man: if a young man dreams to be a man, that is the man they dream to be.

This is why he is so bland. He is the vessel for the audience to dream of being. And they are not.

But of course this is Todd as a young man. He was the young man all young men dream of being.

The old woman: no spoilers.

There’s a hole in the world like a great black pit and the vermin of the world inhabit it and it’s morals aren’t worth what a pig would spit and it goes by the name of London.

At the top of the top of the hole sit the privileged few making mock of the vermin in the lower zoo. Turning beauty into filth and greed.

I too have sailed the world, and seen it’s wonders. For the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru. But there’s no place like London.

The young man is kind. But he is bland. He is so kind. But he is so bland.

There was a guy my friend used to date and he was so bland, so bland. His name was Andrew. And, like Ann in Arrested Development, we called him Egg. Eggdrew. If you don’t get these references, stop reading now.

Eggdrew was a competent young man, about computers or something. I know computers and I never could get a read on him: was he hardware, software, or just a schmoe?

He was a schmoe. He was Eggdrew. He was the bland young man.

He was so bland his black peaked hair made you think of the bland young man in Todd instead of the Mountains of Peru.

His inky black eyes made you think of the bland young man in Todd instead of the Dardenelles.

He was just that bland. He was like Luke Skywalker before he leaves Tatooine.

Everyone must get that reference.

Part three.

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2 Responses to I Review Sweeney Todd (2 of ?)

  1. Pingback: » I review Sweeney Todd (1 of ?)

  2. Pingback: » I Review Sweeney Todd (Part 3 of ?)

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